Daily Journal - March 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 2007
WEDNESDAY, MARCH 7, 2007 - Four years ago today, when we walked into the high school gym, it looked like a
beautiful sacred eden - a holy place - to honor the lives of Andrew and Jarrett. More than 2500 people came to the
visitation because they were touched by our tragedy. We were stunned. Bob and I stood right about where we are in
the picture below for over 7 hours. We couldn't leave because so many people came to express their condolences and
offer their support. We did get to sit down at times but then we'd have to stand up to give someone a hug or comfort a
crying friend or classmate. It was extremely intense as you can well imagine.
When I look at this photo, I remember how much hard work and love went into making that gym a proper setting for this
sad occasion. What wonderful, kind, remarkable angels they were. Dear God, please give them all a special extra
dose of blessings because they deserve it for the way they were able to help us begin our healing journey. Life is a
highway. I like that song. I just found out that I did hear that song when the boys were alive because it was originally
recorded by Tom Cochrane. So, I'm not going crazy after all! Still hard believe it's been four years!!!! djb
beautiful sacred eden - a holy place - to honor the lives of Andrew and Jarrett. More than 2500 people came to the
visitation because they were touched by our tragedy. We were stunned. Bob and I stood right about where we are in
the picture below for over 7 hours. We couldn't leave because so many people came to express their condolences and
offer their support. We did get to sit down at times but then we'd have to stand up to give someone a hug or comfort a
crying friend or classmate. It was extremely intense as you can well imagine.
When I look at this photo, I remember how much hard work and love went into making that gym a proper setting for this
sad occasion. What wonderful, kind, remarkable angels they were. Dear God, please give them all a special extra
dose of blessings because they deserve it for the way they were able to help us begin our healing journey. Life is a
highway. I like that song. I just found out that I did hear that song when the boys were alive because it was originally
recorded by Tom Cochrane. So, I'm not going crazy after all! Still hard believe it's been four years!!!! djb
Thursday, March 8, 2007 - Four years ago at this time, I was rummaging around looking for blank cards to write notes to both
Andrew and Jarrett which I put in their caskets. I told each one that I loved them, thanked them for being my sons and added:
Don't fight with your brother! When the kids went through the line the previous night, they all started placing their student ID
cards in the boys' caskets. They were quite full of stuff from the kids. It was pretty cool to see that happen.
Once we got out to the high school on March 8th, and the service was getting ready to start, Bob and I stayed in a nearby
classroom and tucked that satiny material around each boy and said goodbye forever to their earthly bodies. Bruce closed the
tops and they were gone from view. Good bye my sweeties - I love you forever.
Then, we went out and walked into the gym for the funeral. I can remember that perfectly well because it was videotaped.
Everything else, I have to rely on my steel-trap memory. After we buried them, I do remember that I obsessed about the flowers. I
guess I had to focus on something tangible. For some reason, it was extremely important to me that I knew who gave us each
and every one. There were over 125 plants, flowers arrangements, etc. It took quite a while but it was a welcome distraction.
The thing that stays with me and always will is how kind everyone was. We've always considered ourselves fortunate to have
been here at a time when everyone knew everyone. The boys went to the same two schools for grade school, middle school and
high school. If you were a guy their age, you played baseball, basketball or soccer with or against most of the other kids in your
class. It was a different time. Hopefully, the taxes won't get so high that the people who built Elburn, made it what it is and are
the heart and soul of this area won't be able to afford to live here. How ironic would that be. Time for me to be going now. djb
Andrew and Jarrett which I put in their caskets. I told each one that I loved them, thanked them for being my sons and added:
Don't fight with your brother! When the kids went through the line the previous night, they all started placing their student ID
cards in the boys' caskets. They were quite full of stuff from the kids. It was pretty cool to see that happen.
Once we got out to the high school on March 8th, and the service was getting ready to start, Bob and I stayed in a nearby
classroom and tucked that satiny material around each boy and said goodbye forever to their earthly bodies. Bruce closed the
tops and they were gone from view. Good bye my sweeties - I love you forever.
Then, we went out and walked into the gym for the funeral. I can remember that perfectly well because it was videotaped.
Everything else, I have to rely on my steel-trap memory. After we buried them, I do remember that I obsessed about the flowers. I
guess I had to focus on something tangible. For some reason, it was extremely important to me that I knew who gave us each
and every one. There were over 125 plants, flowers arrangements, etc. It took quite a while but it was a welcome distraction.
The thing that stays with me and always will is how kind everyone was. We've always considered ourselves fortunate to have
been here at a time when everyone knew everyone. The boys went to the same two schools for grade school, middle school and
high school. If you were a guy their age, you played baseball, basketball or soccer with or against most of the other kids in your
class. It was a different time. Hopefully, the taxes won't get so high that the people who built Elburn, made it what it is and are
the heart and soul of this area won't be able to afford to live here. How ironic would that be. Time for me to be going now. djb
One of the many surreal pictures I
have. No one should ever have to
say, "the caskets that contain the
bodies of my dead sons." That's just
wrong.
Andrew's on the left and Jarrett's on
the right. When I get buried, I'll be
next to Andrew. I'm sure Jarrett's
pissed off about that. Why does he
get to be next to Mom? Seriously. I
can hear him say that.
God bless the saintly boys.
have. No one should ever have to
say, "the caskets that contain the
bodies of my dead sons." That's just
wrong.
Andrew's on the left and Jarrett's on
the right. When I get buried, I'll be
next to Andrew. I'm sure Jarrett's
pissed off about that. Why does he
get to be next to Mom? Seriously. I
can hear him say that.
God bless the saintly boys.
Now it's FRIDAY, March 9, 2007 - The bathroom projects are progressing. Bob has a
new shower and the water actually works in there. But the ceiling still needs drywall
and the fan and the light have to be put in. Then, there's the taping, spackling, etc.
In the bathroom downstairs that I LOVE because the shower is very powerful and gets
the soap out of my hair, there's a new vanity. It's gorgeous. It has this very cool
bottom drawer that pulls out so you can put toilet paper in there. What a great idea.
My mirror/medicine cabinet aren't up yet, neither is the new fan/light or the cabinet
above the toilet. When they're all done, I'm going to paint the room myself.
Since I don't seem to be having much luck with my oil painting, I guess I might as well
do something productive, like paint the walls. Of course, I'll have to be VERY, VERY
careful. Yikes!
Avis has the barfy flu which is really a virus, I think. So she can't take any medicine for
it. I talked to her and she's drinking Gatorade and sleeping a LOT. I feel so sorry for
her. That is nasty stuff. I'll have more later on today if I have time. bye. see ya
around, djb
new shower and the water actually works in there. But the ceiling still needs drywall
and the fan and the light have to be put in. Then, there's the taping, spackling, etc.
In the bathroom downstairs that I LOVE because the shower is very powerful and gets
the soap out of my hair, there's a new vanity. It's gorgeous. It has this very cool
bottom drawer that pulls out so you can put toilet paper in there. What a great idea.
My mirror/medicine cabinet aren't up yet, neither is the new fan/light or the cabinet
above the toilet. When they're all done, I'm going to paint the room myself.
Since I don't seem to be having much luck with my oil painting, I guess I might as well
do something productive, like paint the walls. Of course, I'll have to be VERY, VERY
careful. Yikes!
Avis has the barfy flu which is really a virus, I think. So she can't take any medicine for
it. I talked to her and she's drinking Gatorade and sleeping a LOT. I feel so sorry for
her. That is nasty stuff. I'll have more later on today if I have time. bye. see ya
around, djb
Saturday, March 10, 2007 - Bob and I were nominated for the Red
Cross Hometown Heroes Award for Education. Imagine our complete
and utter shock and awe when we found out that we won! We thought
our days in the spotlight were over last year. I know our 15 minutes
should be up pretty soon. They held the breakfast yesterday at 7:30 am
You can go to any of the local papers online to read about it. The guys
who went into the burning car - yes, they made me cry. There were
some very wonderful stories - each one was extremely touching and
inspirational. We felt honored to be among such a stellar group.
I wouldn't put this in here except that I want Jessica to see it because
she wrote me a nice email that she had read about us in the Kane
County Chronicle yesterday. Then last night, someone told me that
they heard me in an interview with Julie Mann on WBBM newsradio
780. That's the station I listen to all the time (so I know what's going
on). Chet said that he heard my voice and he said, "I know who that is!"
THAT cracks me up. Yesterday morning, I was doing fine until we were
getting ready to get up on the stage to get the plaque and I saw the
video that they had prepared and I started to cry. Just seeing the
pictures of the boys which I see every day and I've seen a million times,
made me cry. Then, as I walking up there, my clog fell off. Then, when
I started to talk, I choked up. BUT then it was over, and I could relax
and focus on the rest of the awards. The program was quite well done
- very inspirational. We're not heroes, we're just trying to keep the boys'
memory alive and it does seem to be working, doesn't it! bye djb
Cross Hometown Heroes Award for Education. Imagine our complete
and utter shock and awe when we found out that we won! We thought
our days in the spotlight were over last year. I know our 15 minutes
should be up pretty soon. They held the breakfast yesterday at 7:30 am
You can go to any of the local papers online to read about it. The guys
who went into the burning car - yes, they made me cry. There were
some very wonderful stories - each one was extremely touching and
inspirational. We felt honored to be among such a stellar group.
I wouldn't put this in here except that I want Jessica to see it because
she wrote me a nice email that she had read about us in the Kane
County Chronicle yesterday. Then last night, someone told me that
they heard me in an interview with Julie Mann on WBBM newsradio
780. That's the station I listen to all the time (so I know what's going
on). Chet said that he heard my voice and he said, "I know who that is!"
THAT cracks me up. Yesterday morning, I was doing fine until we were
getting ready to get up on the stage to get the plaque and I saw the
video that they had prepared and I started to cry. Just seeing the
pictures of the boys which I see every day and I've seen a million times,
made me cry. Then, as I walking up there, my clog fell off. Then, when
I started to talk, I choked up. BUT then it was over, and I could relax
and focus on the rest of the awards. The program was quite well done
- very inspirational. We're not heroes, we're just trying to keep the boys'
memory alive and it does seem to be working, doesn't it! bye djb
This is the plaque we received. It's about 11
by 13 inches. The eagles and the flag are
raised. It's very beautiful to see in person.
by 13 inches. The eagles and the flag are
raised. It's very beautiful to see in person.
Every year, Colonial Cafe gives out the
Education Award. We were extremely
honored to be chosen.
Education Award. We were extremely
honored to be chosen.
Sunday, March 11, 2007 - I got up late because yesterday I
impulsively decided to go to the boat in Aurora with Julie last
night. We had a riot. SHE's lucky. I'm not (obviously). Bob
doesn't like to gamble. We figured out that every time I go
there with Julie, she wins. It was fun. Very nice distraction.
While we were driving home late at night - or if you consider
the time change, early in the morning, we saw a coyote in
the corn field on Green Road. Yikes! They're very scary.
Of course, near that field is where Andrew ran into the
largest raccoon EVER. Then, he came home and told us
about it. The next day, sure enough, Bob saw that big dude
on the side of the road. Andrew was quite accurate in his
description. It was HUGE, Mom. That makes me laugh - I
can still see him standing there telling his story.
Better cut this short. I want to go outside and pick up some
of the sticks that are all over the yard. It's quite messy and
looks very untidy. Can it be spring already? Was the
groundhog right? See ya later. bye, djb
impulsively decided to go to the boat in Aurora with Julie last
night. We had a riot. SHE's lucky. I'm not (obviously). Bob
doesn't like to gamble. We figured out that every time I go
there with Julie, she wins. It was fun. Very nice distraction.
While we were driving home late at night - or if you consider
the time change, early in the morning, we saw a coyote in
the corn field on Green Road. Yikes! They're very scary.
Of course, near that field is where Andrew ran into the
largest raccoon EVER. Then, he came home and told us
about it. The next day, sure enough, Bob saw that big dude
on the side of the road. Andrew was quite accurate in his
description. It was HUGE, Mom. That makes me laugh - I
can still see him standing there telling his story.
Better cut this short. I want to go outside and pick up some
of the sticks that are all over the yard. It's quite messy and
looks very untidy. Can it be spring already? Was the
groundhog right? See ya later. bye, djb
Every year, I take a picture of the FIRST crocuses - this
picture is from March 10, 2004.
picture is from March 10, 2004.