Daily Journal - 3/7/06 & 3/8/06 & 3/9/06
Tuesday - March 7, 2006 - It's hard to describe going to a
Compassionate Friends meeting. Everyone there has lost a child.
When other bereaved parents say to me, "I can't imagine (losing two
children)," I know what they mean. They know how great their own
pain is - so multiply that times two. It is unimaginable, isn't it...
I've been extremely impressed with how amazing Andrew and
Jarrett's friends have been through this three-year mark since the
accident and their deaths. They understand it better than a lot of
adults do. Without their AWESOME support, I know it would be
much more difficult. They seem to intuitively know WHAT to do. It
seems as though the students are the teachers.
see ya around, djb
Compassionate Friends meeting. Everyone there has lost a child.
When other bereaved parents say to me, "I can't imagine (losing two
children)," I know what they mean. They know how great their own
pain is - so multiply that times two. It is unimaginable, isn't it...
I've been extremely impressed with how amazing Andrew and
Jarrett's friends have been through this three-year mark since the
accident and their deaths. They understand it better than a lot of
adults do. Without their AWESOME support, I know it would be
much more difficult. They seem to intuitively know WHAT to do. It
seems as though the students are the teachers.
see ya around, djb
Jarrett in his bright yellow Nike shirt with his little buddy
Hobbes, staring at his scrambled eggs. This picture
really cracks me up - hey! That's a pretty good joke,
Jarrett would like it, but he'd say, "Oh, Mom."
Hobbes, staring at his scrambled eggs. This picture
really cracks me up - hey! That's a pretty good joke,
Jarrett would like it, but he'd say, "Oh, Mom."
Wednesday - March 8, 2006 - Three years ago, at this time,
we were at Andrew & Jarrett's funeral at Kaneland High
School. We had it videotaped just in case we wanted to see it
again because it was hard to remember exactly what went on.
They told us where to go and when to be there and we were!
The video only shows their closed caskets being wheeled into
the gym so there's no creepy factor involved except that they're
not alive, of course.
It was weird because in the back of my mind, I kept thinking, "I
should call the boys and tell them where I am and when I'll be
back." That went on for a while. It's hard to change your focus
as a mom from worrying about them every minute to now
wondering where they are every minute. Huge shift in the brain
that has gone into shock.
Watching the actual DVD is quite amazing because we don't
have to "remember" what happened. Everything about it is
quite beautiful from the support of our families and the
community to the support of their friends and classmates - the
choir was awesome! The kids who gave their funny
remembrances is a treasure to watch, and of course, Gary
Augustine's wonderfully moving service!
I'm sure people who haven't walked two moons in my
moccasins might think it's morbid but that's the last time I saw
them, after the service they were buried. We were able to tuck
them in before Bruce closed the caskets.
It's not something you'll ever forget - believe me when I say
that. It's not something I want to forget either. bye, djb
we were at Andrew & Jarrett's funeral at Kaneland High
School. We had it videotaped just in case we wanted to see it
again because it was hard to remember exactly what went on.
They told us where to go and when to be there and we were!
The video only shows their closed caskets being wheeled into
the gym so there's no creepy factor involved except that they're
not alive, of course.
It was weird because in the back of my mind, I kept thinking, "I
should call the boys and tell them where I am and when I'll be
back." That went on for a while. It's hard to change your focus
as a mom from worrying about them every minute to now
wondering where they are every minute. Huge shift in the brain
that has gone into shock.
Watching the actual DVD is quite amazing because we don't
have to "remember" what happened. Everything about it is
quite beautiful from the support of our families and the
community to the support of their friends and classmates - the
choir was awesome! The kids who gave their funny
remembrances is a treasure to watch, and of course, Gary
Augustine's wonderfully moving service!
I'm sure people who haven't walked two moons in my
moccasins might think it's morbid but that's the last time I saw
them, after the service they were buried. We were able to tuck
them in before Bruce closed the caskets.
It's not something you'll ever forget - believe me when I say
that. It's not something I want to forget either. bye, djb
Bob, Andrew, Donna, Jarrett in July 1995
Andrew's head on Jarrett's shoulder - maybe 1993
Thursday - March 9, 2006 - I should start a new journal page today but it takes soooooooo
long. I just want to write a bit, pop in a picture and then go have some breakfast.
Yesterday, I spent all day cleaning the house because the ladies were coming over last
night to continue the discussion about the Andrew & Jarrett scholarship which will end
this year when Jarrett's class graduates. We talked to Leslie at the cemetery. She's
writing the article, and Laura came to take pictures with her most excellent cameras! They
are the most delightful young ladies I've met in a long time. Very personable - plus, they
laugh at my jokes! Which obviously means that they are also quite intelligent!!!! Of course,
they wanted to see the Loch Ness monster DVD. It cracks me up every time. I only wish I
could erase my performance. I look and sound SO goofy. It's pitiful.
I'm putting the scholarship info on here sometime soon - I have to rearrange the page
because it was on the old website. My job today is to get the scholarship application on
here, so that all an applicant has to do is to fill it out and email it back to me. Better get to
work. talk to you later, djb
long. I just want to write a bit, pop in a picture and then go have some breakfast.
Yesterday, I spent all day cleaning the house because the ladies were coming over last
night to continue the discussion about the Andrew & Jarrett scholarship which will end
this year when Jarrett's class graduates. We talked to Leslie at the cemetery. She's
writing the article, and Laura came to take pictures with her most excellent cameras! They
are the most delightful young ladies I've met in a long time. Very personable - plus, they
laugh at my jokes! Which obviously means that they are also quite intelligent!!!! Of course,
they wanted to see the Loch Ness monster DVD. It cracks me up every time. I only wish I
could erase my performance. I look and sound SO goofy. It's pitiful.
I'm putting the scholarship info on here sometime soon - I have to rearrange the page
because it was on the old website. My job today is to get the scholarship application on
here, so that all an applicant has to do is to fill it out and email it back to me. Better get to
work. talk to you later, djb
a little later (3/9) - Just a quick note. I put the Andrew & Jarrett Scholarship history and
recipients on a link on the navigation bar on the Home Page. Don't have the application
on there yet but I will very soon! The page has some VERY cool music on there by Josh
Groban. It was given to me right after they died, and I just came across it again today.
It's quite awesome. see ya later, djb
recipients on a link on the navigation bar on the Home Page. Don't have the application
on there yet but I will very soon! The page has some VERY cool music on there by Josh
Groban. It was given to me right after they died, and I just came across it again today.
It's quite awesome. see ya later, djb
Jarrett - Mr. Cool